Better Ways to Take Care

I used to think I was bad at self-care. Probably because I was. The closest I came to it was pouring a glass (or a bottle) of wine at the end of the day, calling it relaxation, and pretending it wasn’t just another way to check out. It was a shortcut, an easy fix, a way to slip into sweet serenity without having to think too hard about what I actually needed.

But real self-care—the kind that actually leaves me feeling whole instead of hollow—looks different. It’s not grand or complicated. It’s morning stretches when I’d rather keep scrolling in bed. A 10-minute meditation that forces me to sit with myself instead of running away. An Epsom salt bath that makes my muscles feel like they belong to me again. A nap. A walk. Drinking a full glass of water like my body deserves it.

None of these things come with the instant switch-off that alcohol used to provide, but they also don’t come with regret, exhaustion or the slow erosion of my well-being. They take effort, sometimes more effort than I want to give. But I’m learning that real self-care isn’t always about what feels easiest in the moment—it’s about what actually helps. And these days, I’d rather help myself than escape myself.